100mitsubishis | mental link

mental link

DREAM there isn't anything else	THIEF get in get out
DYING a boring side effect	PARTY god that would be awesome

( CODE BY WHAMBAM )

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

( Don't be. There's no love lost between me and her. )

[ This is actually not a deflection. Wow. ]

( Call it guilt. It makes you do the damnedest things, right? )

( It's never made me do anything. )

[That would be listed among the things Kavinsky can't feel, neatly tucked into a list that includes 'unconditional love' and 'pure happiness.']

( Fine, you monster. I'm just saying I like you better anyway. )

( Cool. )

[He likes her, too. She'll feel it, a moving warm front over their link.]

( Don't be guilty. You did what you did. So what? You aren't mommy material. Who gives a shit? )

[ That warmth is as comforting as it is unwelcome. Misato has yet to learn how to hold someone else's heart without promptly running for the hills when it all gets too actual. And still she bristles at mommy material. Everything's a catch-22 with her. ]

( I give a shit. I took her into my home, that's a promise that I'd look out for her. I'm hoping she finds someone better here. )

[ Watch her try to unlearn her father's sins against her only to perpetrate the same mistakes upon the younger generation. The cycle continues. ]

[Fathers. Have they ever done one damn good thing for anyone?]

( And until then, you play guardian angel? I'm not the worst guy here. )

[He might be, actually. Kavinsky feels the Hive under his skin, like the rest of them, but he's kept his social dalliances contained for that very reason; closeness doesn't only make Misato shudder.]

[ Never. Until they toss away a lifetime's worth of work and sacrifice their own lives along with two billion others for the minutest chance that their daughters might survive a global cataclysm, but until then . . . ]

( Honestly, I don't know. You're no good, you know that, but you're not the worst except for when you're trying too hard. )

( No good. )

[It's a far away echo of her words; they've taken Kavinsky somewhere that's too deep for even Misato to follow. The thicket around the memories he's sifting through is thorny and unholy. It pricks and contaminates. There are shadows like men, or the other way around. There is a bass pulse like a heart beat, or the other way around.]

( I wanna know something. What do these good kids do for you? Do you like being around good men, Misa? Does that turn you on? )

[ Misato sighs, a frustrated one directed partly at him but mostly at herself. Words are so deficient, she finds, to truly communicate what she means. She trips and stumbles, apologizes for the wrong turns of phrases and unfortunate timing. Like now. Her mind is muted, made small for fear of causing further offense. ]

( Kavinsky, I'm not trying to push you away to make room for her. )

( Check your ego, doll. I'm good either way. )

[Hollow as a dead tree, eaten up inside by parasites. But it has to be said. He's already given her false expectations by aiding in a rescue mission.]

[ False becomes true if you keep believing in it. Right? False becomes actual if you act upon it. A man kneels down and thinks he's kneeling because he believes. ]

( I know. I know you're good either way but I wouldn't be. )